What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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What's worse than shitting whilst fucking? Losing your eye! Kelvin Yang

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what has two legs, and is red? half a cat.

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why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

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Why did the little kid drop his ice cream? ...... Because he was startled by the pedophiles penis being shoved up his ass.

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Hurr durr, I shit my pants.

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What's worse than being dead? Nothing.

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why did the girl have pink hair? because she died it purple, but it didn't work.

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What do black people eat? What everyone else does!

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Do you know what the forest fire got for Christmas? Your house

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A Stoner sees a bag of chips.

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whats worse then getting a parking ticket? the plague

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So seriously you have never ever played videogames before?

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there are three types of people in this world, those who can't count, and those who can. STFU, you corny loser

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Roses are red Violets are blue, Eat my anus with a spoon.

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What's better than wining the para Olympics? Wining the Olympics.

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What did the buisness man say to the hobo? Nothing, he threw an apple at him and laughed!

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Windows are likes prostitutes. You can have two in the front and two in the back!

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Two bars walk into a guy, and the bartender says, "You're telling the joke wrong, stupid!"

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whats the point of anti jokes? A: the point that it is no point

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Hey, do you wanna hear a joke? A joke.

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Situation: 2 cows eating grass on a warm Sunday night. Question: Why does 9+4=3 1/2? Answer: 69!

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Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your penis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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