roses are red violets are blue me + you =the perfect 2

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I've always hated people saying "last one there is a rotten egg" because don't you want to be a rotten egg so you don't get eaten?

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give a man a blow job and he'll come for a second. teach a man to blow job and .... no that just doesn't work

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What is E.T. short For? So he can fit on ship

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How do you get out of a car with only a baseball bat and a hammer? Unlock the door.

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how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit him with an ax

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What do you call a piece of Swiss cheese with human characteristics? Abnormal.

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How do you get children to behave? Chop them up.

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Q:Why did the dwarf shout abuse at the bus driver? A: He had anger issues, and the price of the ticket was quite unreasonable.

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An animal entered my house tonight ! It could only be one thing : A bear or a dog.

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What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer? dinner

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Why was little georgia afraid of the tea cup ? Because she was tripping over the holocaust.

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Q: Why couldn't the man lick his ice cream? A: Because his body shut down due to the fact that a bullet went straight through his brain. This happened before he could even order his ice cream.

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ROTFL = Reaching out to fellow lossers

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You need to trim these evergreens. Either they are getting low our my van is GROWING!

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What's black and white and red all over? A penuin that got bit by a sea lion.

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Q. How many blondes does it take to put in a lightbulb? A. Cause of 7,8,9!

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Why couldn't the girl go to the bathroom? Because she was obese.

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Why did the pig cross the yard? Because the helicopter was chasing him.

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I have a joke Who is better, Kobe or Lebron? Kobe. But I lied, that wasn't a joke.

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What did the jew say to hitler? SURPRISE!! IM YOUR NEW DADDY

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What did the dying man say to his friends? Nothing. He had no friends.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I just shot up a plaground Now Im heading to an orphanage

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? I do not know because it depends on the woodchuck; however, if some statistical evidence is gathered on the average amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck you most likely would get a close answer, considering that the statistical research was not flawed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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