Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the only way to get across

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Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease

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What do you call a cat with a pop tart for a body and rainbows flying out of its butt? Nyan Cat

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How do you get an elephant into a freezer? You stuff him in there!!

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? She was too tired and was afraid that if she got behind the wheel it might cause her to fall asleep at the wheel which would result in an accident.

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Q: Why did Sarah fall off the swings? A: She had no arms Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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Why is facebook ruining all of the world's social skills? Because Mark Zuckerberg has Asperger's.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? it doesn't matter, it got turned into KFC before it crossed.

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Man goes to doctor, says he's depressed. The world is bleak and hopeless and life just isn't worth living. The doctor thinks for a second then smiles. "Treatment is simple he says, the great clown Pagliacci is in town. Go see him, that should pick you up." The man bursts into tears, sobs hysterically like a child, "But doctor," he says. "I am Pagliacci."

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I had an amnesia joke But it was written down on a slip of paper because someone else wrote it down. Let me just take it out & read it to you

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If your dying how would you avoid getting eaten alive by sharks or rip to shreds by a T-Rex? Fall on a sword

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Q: Why was the little boy late for school? A: His face was stapled to a wall.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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How many blondes does it take to screw a lightbulb? There's too little information to come up with a reasonable answer.

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The Dali Lama walks into a pizza parlor and asks the owner to make him one with everything. After 20 minutes or so the owner brings the Dali Lama a pizza with every available topping. After he finished eating the Dali Lama thanked the owner and left a nice tip.

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A jew walk's into a bar. But actually it was a Gas chamber.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimer whats a rose?

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What do you tell a women with two black eyes? Nothing, you've already told her twice..

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He got hit by a semi.

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- Knock, knock. -- How many dead babies does it take to cross the street and walk into a bar? - That's an odd question to ask to a visitor. -- Your mom.

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“DTF”? Says Will. “No” says Harper.

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Knock, Knock Come in

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Q: How do you make Kobie Bryant cry? A: Kill his family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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