What do you call a fart in a box? Your mom's pussy.

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why did the guy cross the road? Because he felt like it

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He is outside, running for it, Erron, seriously who is We? I thought you where an author.

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Why couldn'nt Sally swing on the swing? Because Sally was a carrot

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Tina: Mom, would you love me if I was straight Mom: Yes Tina: Would you love me if I was gay Mom: Yes Tina: Would you love me if I was Bi Mom: No Tina: Why not Mom: Because that's selfish!

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Q: What's worse than finding a shrimp platter on a babys hand. A: A baby's hand on a shrimp platter

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How many Dean Mckee's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He doesn't know what a lightbulb's for, nevermind how to use one.

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Jennifer Kim... having a boyfriend!

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Rarity: "So, what is that splendid frock of yours saying?" Maud Pie: "It doesn't talk. It's a dress."

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whats your name whats the color of the sky whats the oppisite of down

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Q. What do you get if you cross a suspicious person with a paranoid person? A. Who wants to know

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What does the blond say when she walks out of the salon Nothing, she is hit by a car, and promptly goes into a coma and hasnt said anything since

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An anti-joke

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WHat did the Somalian girl get for Christmas? AIDS

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Well, you need to develop a particular mindset, and while scienTITS claim that its not logical so it does not work... Well, SUGAR, thing is that the mind and emotions, cannot be explained logically either. Let me expand your mind (if I have not already) A astronomer meets up with a brain surgeon, the Astronomer says to the brain surgeon: I do not believe in god. Why? says the brain surgeon. Because I have studied most of the outer space and never found seen any trace of God.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? -250.

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Your mama so fat she often lays awake at night wondering if you father is happy with their sex life. He isn't.

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What more fun than a barrel full of monkeys? A barrel of dead babies

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Wanna hear a joke? Womens rights ;) Wanna hear another joke? Too bad i'm not gonna tell you

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What is blue and has wheels? Grass- I lied about the colour and the wheels.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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What did little John do when he was bored? He went on Anti-Joke

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Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. The stewardess calls secret service and has the man arrested.

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What's most weird about necrophilia? They copulate with dead bodies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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