if john has 400 cookies and eats 300 what does he have left? diabetes

Whats green has 4 legs and would kill someone if it fell out of a tree??? A pool table.....

A horse walks into a bar, and the barman says "why the long face?" The horse replies, "I am Sarah Jessica Parker."

What did the fat man say to the other far man Hey your fat

A grasshopper walks into a bar and no one notices because it's just a little insect.

What do you do if life gives you lemons? Whoa... where did these lemons come from?

waiter! waiter! theres a fly in my soup! the waiter immediately retrieved a new soup and gave them a 50% discount for the misshap.

One time there was a guy who jumped off a bridge and died

How do you find dennis ferguson? Look at danyons bckground

How does Batman's mother call him to dinner? She doesn't, she's dead.

What is black and white and red all over? Zebra domestic violence isn't funny.

The funniest thing happened the other day, it was like one went like this, and the other went like that, and then everyone laughed... ...Oh, its one of those where you would have had to be there to see how funny it was.

Q: If your riding down the Nile on a boat and your boat springs a leak, how many boxes of pancake mix does it take to fix the hole? A: 58, because Koalas are marsupials

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? As Suzy neared the ground while swinging, her foot caught a small hole in the swingset's pebble foundation, and the power of Suzy's momentum along with the sudden stop of Suzy's swing forced Suzy to fly forward off of the swing. Suzy, seeing the silliness of her mistake, laughed it off, and tried to get back up. She quickly realized that her leg had snapped in half. Suzy will never walk again.

how do you kill a black guy ? AIDS

Roses are red My name is Dave This poem doesn't make sense Potato

Josh Groban, John Mayer, Ben Folds and Nick Cave are at an underground club that specialises in lithuanian folk music and siberian vodka. end of story

what did nena say in the library while her and her friends were on anti-jokes? I don't know. I wasn't there.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

Excuse me sir, do you know where I can find the restroom? I don't know, I'm sorry.

These Jokes suck.

What's worse than a guy staring at you? Two guys staring at you.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? "Robin, get in the Batmobile."

What happends when two gay guys want to have kids? They can't, so they go to an orphanage and adopt one.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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