A man walks into a bar. Splash.

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A baby seal walks into a club. It is eventually beaten to death and eaten.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on suicide The librarian gives him permission and he leaves the library with the book in hand.

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3 men of different races walk into a bar. The bartender then proceeds to ask, "what would you 3 men like?"

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What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

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how many flys in a box six --sticksack

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What's the difference between jumping off of a 2 story building and a 20 story building? You're more likely to die from the latter.

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Why doesnt Squidward wear pants? Because he likes to hang loose

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Why can't Julius Caesar use a cell phone? Because he is dead.

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What do you call an Asian who can't drive? Underage, and therefore has not required his license to do so.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No neither has he.

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A gay man watches football.

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Once upon a time there was a young teenager who was bullied a lot. She died 100 years ago.

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Why can't hank swim? Hank is a rock.

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Why did the man go to Jupiter? Because he was on a classified space mission for N.A.S.A.

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When does Adolf Hitler get horny? When his hormones start at it when looking at women.

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Why did the boy throw his alarm clock out of the window? Because he was angry at the alarm going off

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What happened when barba opened the coca cola? The cap flew off and hit the fence then the train then the moon then the pillow then the sun then the pole and the pole fell and hit the baseball and the cap landed on the floor... Then my turtle died

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So two men were drinking beer and one asks "Why are you so sad today, Lenny?" The other man replies "Because I was just diagnosed leukemia." Four days later Lenny dies and his body was buried at Cherryhill Cemetery where his family mourned over his death.

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Why do people on this website suck? Because they are n i g g e r s and jews!

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It's a bird! No, it's a plane! No, it's actually a bird. You can see its wings flapping.

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My uncle told me that slow and steady wins the race. He died in a fire.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops