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Q:What's black, wrinkled and smells like raisins? A: A raisin.

How many blonde chicks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. One to set the house on fire, and the other to call 119.

What's green and gets you high? Marijuana.

Once upon a time there was a young teenager who was bullied a lot. She died 100 years ago.

A grandma starts pinching her grandsons cheeks and saying who's a little cutie pie the baby begins to bleed cause his grandmas nails are peircing his skin

Why couldn't Suzie put on her boots? Because she got her legs amputated.

Why didn't Pat's grandma go to his birthday party? Because she died last night

What is green and if it fell on you from a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

Why does manure smell like poop? Because it is poop.

Your moms so stupid she ate all the food in the grocery store

which is faster a) ferrari b) beetle a ferrari

whats worse than drinking bad milk? tea bagging a bear trap

Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm really drunk so show me your tits.

What do you get when you cross a sheep with a lion? A dead sheep.

I got shot in the balls now i'm pregnant?

Jet fuel doesn't melt steel beams,heat does.

roses are read violets are blue my fanny is orange I have the flu my name is gemma

What would Jesus say if he was alive today? “Nehwê tzevjânach aikâna d'bwaschmâja af b'arha.”

What's brown and liquidy? Brown paint.

What do you get if you cross a goat with a horse? Long letters of complaints by animal rights groups

What do I hate? people

Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree no

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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