Roses are are red Violets are blue I just ate a crockpot!

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Knock Knock Who's there? Ken. Can I some and use your toilet, I really need a shit.

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I'm rubber and you're glue, neither one of us say anything because inanimate objects can't talk.

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Whats the best way to tell if your wife has been cheating on you with the UPS guy? simply ask her, trust and communication in relationships are vital in their survival and growth.

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What does a spider Pig do? Nothing. They dont exist.

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A blond is on her way driving to the airport when she sees the sign "Airport left." She made a left turn and got to her flight on time.

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My wife asked me to prepare our son for his first day of school. He's a ginger so I punched him in the face, and stole his lunch money.

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What did the hand say to the face? Nothing because body parts cannot speak.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

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What was Hellen Keller's favorite color? Velcro.

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What did the Jew say to the black guy? Hey whatsup?

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Why didn't little jimmy take out the trash? He is a rock

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What did the captain say to the priest? We're on a boat.

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a man was beating his wife his wife asks him to stop he says no and continues beating her

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Why did the man cry himself to sleep at night? Because the doctors gave him 3 months to live.

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ah-ah. the proper response to an anti joke.

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Yo mama so short she often has to ask you to retrieve items from the top shelf of her cabinet.

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Q: What's worse than your parents dying in a car crash? A: You were in the backseat and saw your mother plead your father to slit her throat witht he broken glass because her legs were brushed and a windshield wiper was shoved in her kidney. As you stared on in pure horror, your father did as she asked with much contemplation. An ambulance arrives moments later. In the hospital, you tell your dad that you hate him for killing mom. You run away and he dies overnight due to heart failure. Yo suffered paralysis and now and are confined to a wheelchair for the rest of your natural life and are sent away to a born-again foster care home where you are never adopted.

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Q Why did the chicken cross the road A Nobody knows why because nobody is psych

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When it comes ro the zodiac my grandmother was a cancer and... She ws killed by... A giant crab

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Is Barack Obama a dentist, a teacher, or the president of the United States? A dentist. He just happens to have the same name as the president.

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What's better than a stick? A stone

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Knock Knock Whos there? Knock knock? Whos there? Knock knock. WHOS IS THERE?!?!? Knock Knock is, my name is Knock Knock.

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What is blue and has blue shoes? A blue shoe box

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops