What succeeds most of the time? The population of a field with grass.

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Yo momma so ugly, she couldn't fulfill her dream of being a model.

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So a train conductor is going at 70 mph to to a destination 50 miles away. He goes over 3 hills, one at 20 mph, the other 42 mph, and the last at 63 mph. he crosses 2 bridges at 47 mph each. What did the train conductors mom eat for dinner that night Nothing she had cancer and died.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? about 900 pounds

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A duck walks into a bar and says to the bartender "Put it on my bill."

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a very large and muscly guy walks into a bar and finds a scrawny white guy he asks him if he has ever been in a fight with someone bigger then him the man says no the large man then leaves the bar and they both continue on with their day

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Roses are red, and blood is too. But violets are purple. NOT FUCKING BLUE.

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he has a great career and a loving family.

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Q:What happened after the snake tricked Adam and Eve into eating fruit from the tree of wisdom? A: Nothing, but the three of knowledge was a whole other story though. Moral Man.

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what is the difference between the dead baby and the sandwich? i don't put my penis into the sandwich before i eat it.

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Q. What goes 100 mph and is green? A. A frog in a blender

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what has two lags and red all over? :a cat in a chinies restrunt...

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Your momma soo fat.... that if she doesnt start exercising and eating right she will be more likely to get adult onset diabetes.

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his access to goods and services and his future options from birth.

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a dyslexic boy prays to dog.

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I asked my wife to make me a sandwich. I had forgotten she was dead.

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Why did the rooster cross the road? To go play with the other roosters.

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Why was the black person sent to the back of the bus? All of the front and middle seats were taken.

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Q: What is strange about Arabs? A: Very little.

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at him.

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What did the man say to the butterfly? To the butterfly? Nothing. He was probably talking to himself.

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what did the red rock say to the blue rock? Nothing. Rocks can't talk.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? A seal.

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My name's Forrest Gump. People call me Forrest Gump.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops