Q. How does Michael Jackson pick his nose? A. From a catalogue.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Knock knock Who's there? Chicken Chicken who? I can't believe you're talking to a chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q: What do you call a innocent black man that was shot 403 times by the cops when they asked for his ID and somehow assumed he was gonna reach for a gun? A: Deceased Texan.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why'd the gay man get fired from the sperm bank? He was repeatedly late to work.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's green, has six legs and lives in the jungle? A Snooker Table.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why is Short Circuit the best movie ever made? Because it tastes like lemons

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q:what is long ,black and red but smells like poo.? A:poo from someone dying of bowel cancer.!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why was the man afraid of the fish? He had ichthyophobia.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

I walked into a Mcdonald's and ordered a Big Mac. I regretted it later.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Golf.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock knock. Who's there? I don't know, i was wondering if you knew.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A depressed man walks into a bar. He has a drink and heads back to his apartment. On the way he was killed by another man attempting to commit suicide due to depression.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Who didnt visit the orphanage this year? Mom...

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Hello.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Whats worse than the holocaust A: not much

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why was Michael Jackson so bad at dancing? Because he had a broken leg.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why do women wear makeup and perfume? Because they're ugly and they smell bad.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

I had a chocolate chip cookie today, thats it, just a chocolate chip cookie.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

If you can cut half a rope. You can cut the whole rope.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you get if you put a baby in a blender? An Erection

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A rhinoceros walks into a bar. As it felt threatened by the presence of many humans, the rhino attacks and kills several people with the big horn on its nose.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

An asian man walks into a bar and lights a cigarette. He is politely asked to leave due to smoking being prohibited indoors.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What is the difference between a group of magicians and a cheerleading squad? One has a cunning array of stunts.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops