Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go camping, and pitch their tent under the stars. During the night, Holmes wakes his companion and says: 'Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you deduce.' Watson says: 'Someboby stole our tent.' Holmes and Watson look at each other, shrug and go back to sleep. At least the thief kept their blankets.

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why does big tom run the dock because he knows how to speak to skiiers

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had gotten out of its coop.

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I'm not saying my mother-in-law is fat, because she is anorexic.

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Why do white people not eat crackers? Cause it's cannabalism.

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What do you call someone who can legally murder? OJ Simpson

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench can support a family

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Hey i just met you, and this is crazy, i have amnesia, i'm Skepta

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I hate when people see me at the store and are like "What are you doing here??" and Im just like, "Oh, you know, hunting elephants..."

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Jerry: Why arent you talking to me Seth? Seth then explains using sign language that he was born mute and is offended that Jerry keeps forgetting. Then Jerry uses sign language to say" **** off i have alzheimers!"

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What's a pirate's favorite video game? Pirates lived in a time before such technology existed

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What did the black man buy at the store? Nothing he has no money

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Yo mama so fat when she goes to the gym, she makes her trainer skinnier.

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How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? None they would just beat the room for being black.

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint

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The Americans have just spent millions of dollars working on a pen that works in space. I would of just used a pencil.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It escaped.

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Yo' mamma's so poor she's homeless and dying of starvation.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

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why was the boy sad? he had a frog stapled to his face

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Where do you find a dead hooker? where you left her.

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Allah walked into AK Bar

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A deaf man walks into a bar. Someone yells, "FIRE!" and everyone evacuates. The deaf man does not hear him and dies horribly.

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A man finds a lamp and rubs it and a genie pops out and says he'll grant him 3 wishes. The man says "I wish I had a trillion dollars for which I can buy whatever my heart desires" and poof he gets it. The man says "I wish I had a beautiful wife for which I can love forever till the end of time." and poof he gets it. Finally, his 3rd wish he says "I wish I have my own country for which I can rule as king and become the greatest ruler in history." and poof he gets it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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