Roses are red, Violets are blue, My grandmother has degenerative brain disease, We may need to euthanise her.

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Her hair was fine, her scent was great, now show me your fucking ****.......please

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there are three types of people in this world, those who can't count, and those who can. STFU, you corny loser

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Q: What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a sheep? A: A genetic aberration that is an insult to both God and man.

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How do you starve a black man? Take away his current food stocks, and means of income.

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What do Chinese kids have that African kids dont? Chinese citizenship and at least one Chinese parent.

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How did the black guy get knocked out? He was hit by a fridge.

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When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

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What's invisible? A lot of stuff.

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Why Cant michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he is dying of Parkinson's disease.

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A boy got scratched by a dog and nearly killed him. When he grew up, a dog came running up to him and started biting and scratching him till he couldn't handle it. Then a plane crashed into him and he died.

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what do call a girl with a waterslide nose? Ava Sherman

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What's the difference between a black man and a bench? A bench is nonsentient, generally heavier and not necessarily light-dark brown colored, whereas the black man is fully capable of thinking and usually has dark toned skin.

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Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

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What's brown and sounds like a bell? An old rusted bell.

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LOVING BIRD DIEING BIRD DO NOT FLY AWAY

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Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton? A: Napoleon bone-apart.

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Knock knock. "Whose there?" "Dave" Oh alright Dave, two seconds I have got to unlock the door~looks for and finds keys and unlocks door~ Hello Dave, sorry mate not been out yet so not been out, come in.........

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whats worse than 4 dead monkeys? 5 dead monkeys.

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What did the homeless man buy with a dollar? Nothing. He didn't have a dollar.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

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You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

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What is a six letter word for cactus? Cactus

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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