You can pick your nose, and you can pick your friends nose. But you can't rob a bank. That's a felony.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Lol! The connection timed out. Double D`s they kill my back so I am gonna get them reduced someday, and sure because it gets really itchy otherwise.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

what happened to the man who got hit by a truck driven by Obama? he died.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

why did the man stay home on a monday? He was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

You are the most beautiful person in the world.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

your mumma so fat when she stepped on the scales it said her phone number

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What's long and hard and full of semen? An erect penis at the climax of an orgasm.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why the babie was not drinking his milk? He was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Q: What's not funny and has three wheels? A: The Holocaust, I lied about the wheels and not being funny.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What do you call a fart in a box? Your mom's pussy.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Do you want to hear a joke, Women's rights

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A group of cows boarded a spaceship and was launched into orbit around the Earth. It was the herd shot around the world.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Hey I just meet you. And this is crazy, but im a Zombie. And you looks tasty!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How many Norwegians does it take to change a light bulb? Only one. But all the replacements are high-tolerance, long-life and non-dimmable.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Your mother is so slutty that she seduced me while I was drunk. I'm so sorry.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

what happened to the boy who got hit by a truck he went to the hospitel

thumb_up thumb_down -22

God Nero, Marry me now! I removed the nose thingie but it wont stop.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A: What do you call a female bombing the white house? Q: A terrorist

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Hej Erik och Leo!!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What is orange and sticky? A blue ice cream with no skeletal structure Hang on, Ice Creams don't talk and the ice cream wasn't even yellow!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A polish guy Is sick of being made fun of for his ethnicity, so he decides that he is going to act Italian thinking that no one makes fun of Italians. He stays home for weeks to practice this and one day walks out, up to a store and says"eh, get me some lasagna and zucchini !" the man at the store asks if he's polish.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Two Canadian men are sitting in a room. Man 1: Do you know what happens when you shoot a wolverine? Man 2: No. Man 1: It absorbs the bullets, duh. The second man proceeds to go outside with a gun. He returns in a few minutes. Man 1: What did you do with that gun? Man 2: I shot a wolverine. Man 1: What happened? Man 2: It fell over and died. I think you watch too much X-Men.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

what did the bus driver say to the black man when he got on the bus? nothing, carl has become very anti-social since his brother died

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops