What's the difference between a goat and a cherry? You can't put a goat on top of your ice cream.

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someone called someone else a frog

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Barack Obama, Mother Teresa and Stephen Hawkings had race. Who won? Barack Obama. This deduction can be made as Stephen Hawking is severely disabled by a motor neurone disease known as amyotrophic lateral sclerosis. Henceforth, he has very limited control over the majority of his body and is confined to a electric wheel chair. Thus, he could not participate competitively in the race. Moreover, Mother Teresa is dead. This unfortunate occurrence was caused by several myocardial infarctions in combination with pneumonia. Regardless of this, Mother Teresa's meek and frail build would slower her speed considerably; in comparison to Barack Obama's relatively athletic and robust frame. Nonetheless, President Obama is a smoker. Therefore, he may experience symptoms associated with emphysema during the race, causing him to retire. As such no-one would finish the race, leaving the spectators feeling very disappointed and empty.

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What's the difference between ten dead babies and a Ferrari? There's no Ferrari in my garage.

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Whats the definition of not winning? Charlie sheen losing custody of his son because he is a coked out, old man douche bag, who only gets told what he wants to hear because he forks out lots of money to gold digging hookers.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being ripped apart by an angry orangatang because orangatangs have the strength of ten men.

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What did the french toast say to the french fry? I don't know, I don't speak french.

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What is the worst part about eating a vegetable? Eating the wheelchair too.

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No, I had no idea, nor did I know that Nero means Black or Darkness until I searched it up some weeks ago. No, I would never photoshop anything, I mean sure I am the girl/woman thing with the big tits, but that`s like all I got going... Oh and yeah I use glasses sometimes because these contact lenses become itchy after a while and stuff.

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Paper or plastic? Yes...

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Q: how do you get an clown off a unicycle A:You hit it with a police baton

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what's red and has seven feet? the red man who had seven feet as a result of a serious genetic mutation

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A man is eating in a restaurant and says, "Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!" The waiter says, "I'm sorry, can I bring you some salad instead?"

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Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

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Why was Osama Bin Laden so hard to find? His hiding place was difficult to come across.

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Why can't Elvis Presley drive a car backwards? Because he's dead!

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How many midgets does it take to screw in a light bulb about 4

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What has four wheels and flies? A flying car.

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Whats worse than finding a repeated joke on anti joke? The holocaust Whats worse than finding a repeated joke on anti joke? The holocaust

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What is the difference between a calendar and you? A calendar has dates!!

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Why couldn't the cat drink it's milk? Because it didn't have a face.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? having your titties super glued to a triceritops' as cheeks while the triceritops has chronic diahrea

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Why did the cat scratch the person? Because it's mean.

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Why do aliens listen to relaxing music while they have sex? They like to cum in peace. \m/

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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