Why can't Scrillex fish? Because He is too busy to practice fishing.

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Why are there so many smiths in the phonebook? Because they all have phones.

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whats worse than finding a joke in a cracker? finding an anti joke in a cracker.

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Q. Whats red and smells like blue paint? A. Wheres my tractor?

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Why did the man lose the a race? 'Cause he has no legs

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5 blondes walk into a bar They all leave very intoxicated and die in a car accident shortly after.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Mother: "George what happenend to your pet rock?" George:"I dont know." Mother:"Here! I found your pet rock. It was in the same place it was before!"

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So a Buddhist said, "YOLO." ._.

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why did the computer monitor stop working? Becasue it has a date with a slice of cheese.

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the reason why waldo is hiding from chuck norris is because they are playing hide and seek.

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Think of a number 1-10 Now add 39 Divide that by 20 Subtract two Now close your eyes.. Dark isn't it?

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What did the waffle say when the black guy started eating him? Nothing, because waffles are inanimate objects and therefore cannot talk.

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Why do women wear makeup and perfume? Because they're ugly and they smell bad.

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Why did the monkey cross the road? Because he saw the chicken do it.

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Did you hear about that creepy guy on Facebook? He was un-friended

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see, monkey do. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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A man walks into a bar. He has a nice drink and leaves.

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How many Jews does it take to change a light bulb? Three. One to change the light bulb and two to file a lawsuit.

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What is green and is not grass A frogg

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A guy wearing a top hat walks into a bar. He says, "Ow."

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When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

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What does a black guy get for Christmas? Everything you own

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How many drugs does it take for Eminem to sing in a live concert? Enough.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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