How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 17

What did the caterpillar say to the robot? Nothing. Caterpillars do not have vocal chords and there are not, as yet, any truly portable robots capable of comprehending speech so to speak to one would be pointless.

Lets just say some of my boys owed me a favor, and that if we where all "clean slate workers" I would never have been able to pull some favors out of the higher ups. As far as for "these Shadows" of yours, I know nothing, while I invented the encoding format for the messages you use, I intend keeping it to myself. People here will still assume this is bullshit unless you get somebody to hack this site, believe me, its pretty damn easy to retrieve whatever data might have been lost.

What was so sad about the white woman who dropped her Starbucks? It fell on her baby in a nearby stroller giving it third degree burns, disfiguring its face.

A brunette, a redhead, and a blonde go on vacation in Hawaii. They plan to swim to the next island. The brunette and redhead do it with no problem. The blonde swims halfway and realizes she is tired. She continues to swim straight ahead knowing her friends are already at the next island.

What do you call someone with no arms, one leg,and an eye patch? names

Knock knock. Who's there? There's no need to ask this question due to the fact that most homes are built with peepholes nowadays.

What did the boob say to the bra? sup bra

Why was the clock off? Because it was broken

How did the clown get the baby to stop crying? He hit it with an axe.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse says "I have Cancer."

What's worse then 10 dead babies in 1 tree? 1 dead baby in 10 trees...

Why can't Hellen Keller play the piano? She's dead.

What's black, white, and red all over? Numerous different objects because many different things can posses a variety of colors, including the ones listed above.

What did lil' Bobby get for christmas? Cancer.

If 2 wrongs make a right and 2 rights make a wrong, then when you have 4 rights=2 wrongs, you have a true statement. If you have 8 rights = 4 wrongs, you have a verified statement.

Q: What is red and smells like blue paint? A: Green paint.

What happened when a Black man ran into a white supremacist? They exchanged insurance information

whats worse then getting a parking ticket? the plague

What did the one Brick say to the other Brick? We have the same name.

There are 11 people hanging onto a rope that comes down from an airplane. 10 of them are blonde, and one is a brunette. They all decide that one person should get off because if they don't, the rope will break and everyone will die. No one can decide who should go, so finally the brunette delivers a very touching speech, ending with the words, "I'll get off." The blondes, all moved by the brunette's speech, start clapping. Problem solved.

Why did Hellen Keller drive off of the cliff? Because she is a woman.

What's brown and red? I lied about the red, it's dirt.

What do you call a black priest? Holy shit.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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