Lockerbie bombing

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Q: What do cooks do for a living? A: Eh muffin.

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What's black and white, and red all over ? An interracial couple who were both gruesomely decapitated in a freak car accident.

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That awkward moment were your giving your girlfriend a blowjob then you realize your giving your girlfriend a blowjob.

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your moms so fat she has kankles

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up.

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Do you think retarded people know that they are retarded? I don't know, you tell me. Wait a second....did you just call me retarded? They are clueless.

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What did the lion say the the zebra? Nothing. Lions do not have the ability to speak and therefore could not make conversation with said zebra, hunted it down, killed it, and shared it with his pride of 27.

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how do you wash clothes in the diswasher? you turn it on.

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what happened to the christian when he died? nothing because god isnt real.

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AND

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Why shouldn't women wear watches? Because there's a clock on their cell phones.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Fed-Ex. We have a package for you.

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Three blondes walk into a bar. They have an intellectual conversation over some drinks.

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Why did the Sara fall off the swing, Because she had no arms. Knock, knock Who's there not sara.

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How do you give a 90 year old woman a pap smear? You don't

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar He sits down and has some trouble reading the menu but orders a beer

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because he wasn't invited.

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A Christian and a Jew walk into a bar. The bartender says "What'll you two have to drink?" The Christian says "I'll have a beer." and get this, the Jew says................................"I'll have a beer too."

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Man: Drink this. Man 2: Ok. (Drinks it) Man; You drank a powerful substance that is 20000 times stronger than hydrochloric acid! Man2: Oh FUCK! Kelvin Yang.

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Q. How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A. Lets go ride bikes

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Roses are red, Violets are red, The grass is red, The garden is on fire.

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Lacrosse

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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