Heard about the dyslexic fellow who sold his soul to Santa? That worked out OK, but Christmas was hell.

Whats the difference between a black guy at the beach, and a black guy at the zoo? One is at the beach, and one is at the zoo.

Q. Why was the boy depressed? A. Because he lives in a world where apparently all girls are right.

What do you call a black drug dealer? A black man that works as a drug dealer

A boy plays in his garden. Then he fall and his knee hurts a lot, but he doesn't cry. Do you know why? Because he's dead.

What did the boy with cancer, no arms, and no legs get for his birthday? Nothing he was dead.

What is big, grey, has 8 wheels, can fly, swim and walk. I dunno. Thats why I'm asking

Knock Knock Who's there? You have AIDS.

Roses are red. Violets are red. Daisies are red. WHY IS MY GARDEN ON FIRE?

what do michael Jackson and little boys do in the dark alone? they turn on the flashlight

Roses are red Violets are Blue Let's just screw

(Something terribly disturbing that people find funny)

All the other kids with the pumped up kicks died in a school shooting.

Why was the black man pulled over on his way to KFC? Because he ran a red light.

A frog, duck, monkey and beaver each enter a bar being carried by a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. If your wondering, the redhead carried two animals.

Why do so many people enjoy these jokes. They are funny

why did the blue berry cross the road

What did the tree say to the plant. Nothing tree's cant talk.

A man that says YOU SUCK MY DICK YEAH!finds a woman that says YOU SUCK MY BOOB YEAH!They get married,The woman is actually a gay man!

A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he is keeping company with a swine, and the muslim feels offended for the poor horse.

Why couldn't the driver start his car? Because the driver was a tree

Oh you're dating my ex? Do you want my unfinished sandwhich too? And my old shoes? And a couple of my shirts I don't wear anymore? How about a my toys I used to play with? Or my spoiled pickle that's been in my car for about a year and a half after I went to the mall with my friends, we watched a movie, I don't remember which one it was but it was funny, then after that we went to McDonald's and it was the first time I heard of McGangbang and it was pretty good. After that I think we went to Jerry's cousin's house, he was a cool guy until I found out that he likes Tyga, so I ended up never talking to him again.... I went off topic, sorry

Why did Sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by a truck. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally. Why did Sally fall of the swings? She had no arms. Why didn't Jimmy help her up? Jimmy is a fish. There's a guy with no arms and no legs who loves to swim. What's his name? Bob. Ya know Bob's twin brother is in the same condition. He loves to play in the leaves. And what's his name? Russell. Why couldn't Sally swing on the swing? She had no arms. What did the girls mom tell her to do before she went to bed? Go to bed. How do you wake up Will Ferrell? You set his alarm clock to a reasonable hour. What did the fat man who had his car stolen tell the police? Someone stole my car.

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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