I can't stand being in a wheelchair.

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Q: how do you get a clown off a swing? A: You hit it with a axe

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What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

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Q:What did the slut have in her mouth? A: teeth.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? "Get in the car Robin."

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Why was the black person assassinated behind a drug dealers house? He was purposely shot in the leg and bled out before he could make it to help.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Dwarf Shortage

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Why Was the student driver using his cell phone in the car? Because he had gotten in a mild accident with a midsized sedan so he was quickly dialing his AAA agent for roadside assistance so he can get back to his loving family and three children

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A blonde drank an entire fruit smoothie in one sitting. She got a brain freeze.

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A man is driving the speed limit of 55 on the highway. He gets pulled over and the cop says, "Do you know how fast you were going sir?" The man replies "Well yes I was going 55, the speed limit." The cop says, "No you were going 80." The speedometers broken.

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Why did the chicken get hit by a bus? He tried to cross the road.

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So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

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Q:why did jimmy fall of a swing? A:Because someone threw a fridge at him

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How is a monkey like a bicycle? They can both climb trees. Except for the bicycle.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

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What's the difference between my girlfriend and a dead baby? I don't make out with my girlfriend after sex.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Your face Godammit!!!

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What's the difference between a duck? Both legs are of equal length, especially the right.

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So Colton Yepma walks in to Accounting and proceeds to read jokes

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Why'd the gay man get fired from the sperm bank? He was repeatedly late to work.

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What is the worst part about eating a vegetable? Eating the wheelchair too.

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What is the worst party ever? Nazi.

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What did the dog say to the rabbit? I quite liked Prince's first album.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops