A Palestinian woman asks a man for directions. She is promptly stoned to death.

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why did the girl ask for food? because she was hungry and hadnt eaten in days.

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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Why don't you make like a tree, and get out of here.

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What's the difference between 10 dead baby's and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage

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9/11 my birthday

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? The battery on her phone is dead and she needs to recharge it. (Good thing there's no emergency.)

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Violets are blue and/or violet Roses are red so's my blood, see?

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Why did two rhinos engage in vigorous sex? They were horny.

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What do you get when you mix a turtle and a dog An animal

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Why did the boy lose his change? He had no Pants Why did the boy have no pants? The Holocaust

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What did the african child get for christmas? Abducted.

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A man walks into a bar with a frown. The bartender asks, "Why are you sad." "My wife got brutally raped then shot last night."

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There were two planes to take off.. One did, the other not at all..

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Chuck Norris was in a staring contest with the sun. He's blind now.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. ( to heaven )

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Wanna hear a joke? Me neither.

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I am strangling you. Do you see my arms? I AM FREAKEN STRANGLING YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

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Q. Why did Lucy fall off the swing? A. She had no arms Q. Why didn't she get back up? A. She had no legs Q. Why did no one help her up? A. She had no friends Q. Why did Lucy fall off the swing A. She had no arms You: knock knock Other person: who's there? You: not Lucy

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Roses are red Oranges are orange Nothing rhymes with orange Forever alone

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What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? Please, not the nails.

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Why did the tomato fall off the swing? Because tomatoes don't have arms.

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some dude: weed is bad Other dude: then why do they prescribe it to people are you dumb or are you stupid

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3 Men walk into a bar, they all order up a drink. And then they paid their tabs and left.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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