Why did the little boy throw rocks at his sister? ...Because she has cancer.

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Why did the goat cross the road. To put his sacrifices into the pentagram.

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Lukas: can i have a cigarette? Scott: i dont know can you? lukas: may i? Scott: NO

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What do you call two dog? dogs

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it ain't easy being cheesy Max Harrison

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why did the chicken cross the road? he was stapeled to a cow and the cow got hit by a bus so they died.

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Why didn't the little boy have a good time at his birthday party? Because his friends lit him on fire.

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How do you keep an idiot in suspense? You watch a suspenseful TV program and pause at the right moment.

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Q: whats red, spins, and screams? A: a baby in a blender

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When is the best time to wear a striped sweater? All the time.

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What is the meaning of life? Bill Gates: Windows Donald Trum: Money Some poor kid:luck and rich parents.

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A stand-up comedian quits his job. He has social anxiety and can't stand the pressure.

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Why did the circus clown lose his balance? He had a seizure while on his unicycle, fell off, and bumped his head, leading to significant blunt trauma in the brain. Weeks later, after waking up from a coma, the doctors discover that he can no longer speak anything other than gibberish. His friends and family decide that he cannot go on living this way and decide to pull the plug.

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There were two blondes going to California for the summer, they are about two hours into the flight and the pilot gets on the intercom and says we just lost an engine but it is all right we have three more but it will take us an hour longer. A half hour later he gets on the intercom again and says we just lost another engine but its all right we have two more it will take us another half hour though. One of the blondes says "If we lose the two last engines we will be up here all day"

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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Me: Hey Chris! Chris: WTF.u.c.k

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how do u make a plummer cry? Kill his children.... :)

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Imagine yourself in a box with no windows and no doors. How do you get out? Stop imagining.

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Whats the difference between a watermelon and babies I don't have a pile of dead watermelon in my basement

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What happened to the plumber payed in gum? His family left him because he was irresponsible with his business

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released in a nearby park in a safe and risk free process.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because I pushed him.

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What is red and smells like blue paint? Read paint.

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steve walked into a bar, what happened next? A: He fell down.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops