Whats better then free candy from a guy in a van? Trying to find his lost puppy so his kids don't cry.

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Why did the monkey eat the banana? Because it was sexually confused

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Yo momma is so fat that she is in the guinness records

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Why did the german killed the jew? Because he was nazi.

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Why does the cow eat grass? A: Because it's green. (Cows are colorblind)

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If little jimmy has five candy bars and he eats three, what does little jimmy have? Diabetes

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What's worse than sex with a midget? Non-consensual sex with a midget.

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How many Jews does it take to change a light bulb? Three. One to change the light bulb and two to file a lawsuit.

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What's black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Nothing. Blackberries grow on bushes and I do not condone hate crimes.

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what happened to the kid who opened the goldfish? he got eaten by a cixelsyd dinosaur

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Q: a man in a camry runs over his wife. who's fault is it? A: toyota and their breaks.

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What is the difference between a Mexican and a bike? they both get hit by cars in shady neighborhoods, like Copiague, New York

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Where can you find a tetraplegic? Where you left him.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in an open hole Poor body disposal practice

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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There was once a boy named Aladin. He was very poor until he found a magic lamp. When he rubbed the lamp, a genie poped out of the lamp. He said... "I will grant you one wish, master" Aladin thought about this for a long time, until eventually he said... "I wish for all the chocolate in the world" "Very well, master" And the genie granted his wish and Aladin had all the chocolate in the world Unfortunately, because he ate so much chocolate, Aladin died of heart & liver failure

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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What was the color of the big lipped, struggling rap artist who violently raped and killed a young woman after robbing a convenience store at gunpoint? Red. He was covered in blood.

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Why was 10 afraid of 9? Because 9-8-7-6-5-4-3-2-1...Kaboom!

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his access to goods and services and his future options from birth.

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I put the STD in stud now all i need is U

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Q: How many times did the chicken cross the road? A: One and a half.

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Yo momma so fat that she was diagnosed with obesity and may need medical assistance in the future and will be reliant on you, her child.

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Rebecca Black walked into a stadium. There were so many seats to choose from. But, she sat down in the nearest seat she could find and enjoyed the football game.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops