Stephen Hawking walks into a bar..... Wait..... How?

What did the mother give her family for christmas? Nothing. The family is Jewish.

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven beats his wife.

What did the man say to the atractive woman? Hi

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizzas don't scream when you put them in the oven.

What's the difference between peanut butter and jam ? Among many things, one is made with peanut butter, the other with fruits.

Ya well your momma's so hot...I'd bang her

What blue and red? poop in a saggy bag

What did I say when I fell of THEEeEeeeeeeee...

Q:How do you make an accountant cry ? A: You kill his whole family

What is long, erect, and 12 inches long? A ruler.

What did Jesus say to Moses? Jesus doesn't exist. Moses replied, "Do you think I'm stupid, you're standing right next to me!"

My dad beats my mom At checkers

What did Jesus say to Moses? Jesus isn't real. Moses replied, "Do you think I'm stupid? I'm talking to him!"

What do you call a man with no arms or legs wearing lead weights in a pool? Screwed.

Why did the white man rub the black man's hair for good luck? Because it's good luck to rub a black man's hair.

The number one killer of daredevil's is the ground.

What's the difference between an Asian driver and a Belgian prostitute? Nothing at all: Marie-Edith Yang is proud of her mixed heritage, and earns a decent wage in a relatively clean brothel in the lovely little medieval town of Bruges.

Women's rights.

Chuck Norris walks into a bar. Someone asks for his autograph to which he replies. "Sure"

Jews for Jesus

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Somebody call animal control, there's a horse in the bar." The horse is then taken away and made into glue and dog food.

How do you drown a blonde? Hold her head under water.

Were you born yesterday? Because I've got an erection...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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