A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

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Why did the old man lose his cane? He didnt. He had alzheimers

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Whats the difference........ Between a duck?

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Sex with helen keller.

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What's worse than a pile of dead babies? People that make dead baby jokes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to commit suicide

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What's the difference between jumping off of a 2 story building and a 20 story building? You're more likely to die from the latter.

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NeroChan, I have said nothing to you, that you have not taught me, if nothing else you have indirectly inspired yourself, you will get back on your feet, you just need to take one step at the time, I know how ambitious you are, but you always focused on helping others, hiding, seeing yourself as a sinking ship, trying to help as many as possible before you pass away. We can work trough this together, it is easy to figure out that you are trying to protect others from what you feel that you have become, something that cannot be repaired, something that was never meant to be fixed, but to be used until it had no more to give.

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Why from a friends phone? I demand a full explanation, here, you got my number, you got my home address, and who the hell was that crying little bitch on the phone? I got friends in the UK which owe me some money, and nothing to lose, if I have to take care of you before you take care of me and even possibly my wife in the crossfire, I will take you down and everything in my path! Moral: Got ya!.

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Chuck norris doesn't make his own butter he roundhouse kicks the cow and the butter comes straight out.

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Jim: Kevin, how old are you? Kevin cries because they are twins. His Brother was hit in the head with a bat yesterday and does not remember anything.

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School is like a boner. It is long and hard unless your asian.

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how do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? it doesn't matter. she can't climb up a tree with only one arm.

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what did the man say to the other man when he saw a dinosaur look.

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What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

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What did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware River? "Men, we're crossing the Delaware River."

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What blew the baby's mind? Daddy's knuckles.

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What did one jew say to the other jew? Want some pizza?

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If one train is heading North at 60 mph, na danother train is heading South at 45 mph, how many waffles are on the roof? The answer is purple, because aliens like coffee.

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why did susie fall off the dollar coaster? it only cost 50 cents susie is gone now

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What does a homeless guy do when he's hungry ? Nothing, he has no food.

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What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the police. The police catch them, and they are sentenced to jail.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic and so am i

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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