Why can't hank swim? Hank is a rock.

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what do u call a black guys dick a pogo stick

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There was a kid and one day he didnt do his homework...he failed.

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There are two cows in a field. One cow says to the other - 'Are you afraid of the mad cow disease?' The other cow says - 'No, cuz I'm a duck.'

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Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub. The first polar bear says, "Pass the soap." The second polar bear replies, "No soap, radio." OMG YOU DON'T GET IT?!?!?!?! NOOB

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Why did the bus drive off the cliff? It's driver happened to be a tomato.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No neither has he.

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Why did the man go to Jupiter? Because he was on a classified space mission for N.A.S.A.

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Why was the man happy to see his wife dead? He beat her

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In Soviet Russia, this type of joke would be considered evidence to throw you into the gulag.

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What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

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Why did the german killed the jew? Because he was nazi.

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What did God say to Adam and Eve? Be fruitful

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Comes a giraffe on a scooter to the hospital and asks: 'can I have some flour?'.

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Knock knock Come in

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Why did the chicken cross the road? If you don't know the answer by now, there's something wrong with you.

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Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at Mcdonalds? Because I don't have a job, are you hiring?

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Dwarf Shortage

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Why am I constipated? I ate fiber glass insulation.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Why would a dog sniff another dog's butt hole? Because that is what they do.

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My friends all use twitter but i dont know how to use it, so i said i will carry a megaphone around saying what i am doing at random times. Like yesterday i was in the library so i said into my megaphone "i am in the library" Yay i got 3 new followers, 2 of them were cops. Jokes From Blox Computers Corporation [Thailand] Bellow Joke In Thai: ?????? Twitter ???????????????? ??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? ? ???????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? "i am ??????????" ??????????????? 3, 2 ????????????????????

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why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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In other news, a Florida man was arrested today for stealing candy...with a knife.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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