Why didn't Cheryl's mother recognize her when she was wearing a blue shirt and jeans? Because Cheryl's mother has Alzheimer's.

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Why didn't the man get into Harvard? Because he had bad grades

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How do you save stop your soulmate from dying of cancer? Shoot them on the head.

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Q: Whats white and fluffy? A: White fluff

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why is the spine-tailed swift the fastest bird? because its faster than the second fastest bird.

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How do you fit 500 babies into a phone booth? With a blender. How do you get them out? Nachos (make a dipping and snacking motion).

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Have you seen stevie wonders new house No Niether has he

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see, monkey do. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Having a giant, angry ape on steroids rip your heart out and eat it before your eyes as you painfully die from the unbearable pain and rapid blood loss.

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Knock Knock Who's there It's me open the door

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Who created Apple? Steve jobs.

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Knock Knock -Who's there? No one -Ok

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What is green and is not grass A frogg

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Why did the Salesman leave the leper colony? He had to wish his daughter a happy birthday.

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What did the helicopter say? Aluminum-minum-minum-minum-minum-mum-mum-mum-mum-um-um-um-um

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his access to goods and services and his future options from birth.

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How do you kill a jew? Same way you would anyone

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gay boys house. Knock knock! whose there? The chicken!!

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What is the opposite of Obama? Mitt Romney because he his white and a republican so all is good with him.

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What's brown and sits in the woods? Winnie's poo

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Why couldnt rex bark??? because he was a fish!

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What do you call a black man with a gun? Officer.

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How did the hairless cat braid its hair? It didn't, it was hairless. Also, cats do not have opposable thumbs.

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What's the difference between jumping off of a 2 story building and a 20 story building? You're more likely to die from the latter.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops