Three girls are walking in the woods they see tracks one thinks it is a bear the other thinks it is a deer the last one thinks it is a lion They all argue till they get hit by a train and realized they were train tracks

Why did the chicken cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist bastard.

A black person goes up to the drive through at popeye's, what did they say? Nothing, it was closed.

Whats red and tastes like parsley? Not Red Parsley

Bigfoot, the loch ness monster, and self-respecting Justin Beiber fans are all the same, your told they exist, it's not true.

When life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. Well, that's going to be some horrible lemonade if life doesn't also give you water and sugar.

A woman takes a shortcut through a dark alley. She is raped, robbed, and murdered. Her family mourns her death.

there was a lesbian, a bi-sexual and a homosexual at a wine bar having a drink.......They had a great night

A squirrel asks an apple where is the nearest gas station. The apple doesn't reply.

Q. Why did the boy fall off the swing? A. He had no arms or legs. Q. What did he get for Christmas? A. A drumset Q. Knock Knock Who's there Not him

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

what did the woman say? 'duhhh, i don't have a penis durr durr' (By the way, I'm trying to be not misogynistic, please let me know if you find this misogynistic in any way)

So, there's a black man, an Asian man and an Irishman who are in a bar, politely discussing wether the Asian's phone would break if it was thrown from a plane in the Pacific Ocean. The black man says "Of course it would break." The Irishman says "I have no opinion on this..." The Asian man says "I think it would break, you are right John." Suddenly, a man enters.

Q:How many dead babies fit in a bathtub? A:It depends on the bathtub, but if all of them were the same size, babies also differ in size and sometimes shape. If all bathtubs and babies are the same, the number would be 1, because every baby will be as big as the bathtub.

The next sentence is true. The previous statement is false.

Do you know what would happen if Hitler was still alive today. Nothing he's not.

Why did dallin fall off the swing he got hit by jds big penis

Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton? A: Napoleon bone-apart.

Before you insult a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you insult him, you'll be a mile away, and have his shoes.

KNOCK KNOCK who's there? OUCH! what's your door knob made of? nails?

What do you call a spaceman on Mars? Confused, because with the current technology it is impossible to send a human into space and onto Mars.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put C where A is. :D

Why did Hitler kill himself? He realized what he'd gotten himself into and became severely depressed

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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