Why did the retard have no friends? Because somebody stitched his mouth and eyes shut so he couldn't be social.

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What do you call a person falling off a cliff Dead

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One day there was a guy who went on a date with a girl. They went to the movies and ate popcorn. After the movie ended they had a candlelit dinner at a restaurant nearby. The guy ordered a fried chicken and the girl ordered a watermelon salad. They went home after a great dinner. I'm not sure how the story ends but I remember the story was racist.

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What is the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry Potter escapes the chamber.

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You know what the best part about sleeping pills is? No, what is it? Zzzzzzzzzzz

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There once was a man from Nantucket who secluded himself from the outside world because of a tragic event that happened to him as a child.

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Why did the chicken cross the road Banana

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Two black people passed me in an alley at night...... They said hi

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What did the little boy say when he was sick? Nothing. He stayed in bed and slept all day.

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A black man killed someone

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What's worse than losing your job? 9/11

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How do you kill a blue elephant, with a blue elephant gun, how do you kill a pink elephant, you strangle it until it turns blue and shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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whats the difference between a pizza and a jew -a pizza is food

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josh simpson has cancer

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Q: What did the Miracle Whip say when the refrigerator door was opened? A: Nothing. Miracle Whip cannot speak.

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What's the difference between blacks and whites? The skin color

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Cracked.com the only (depressive) "humor" site.

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A man from florida and a woman from florida go to a restaurant, which isnt very popular.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7... Because 7 raped her little sister

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A farmer goes out to the coop to feed the chickens. They're all dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken probably crossed the road because of some sort of impulse or external stimuli (most likely a bug or a worm located on the other side of the road) in which he or she responded to by proceeding to cross the road in order to get to the other side as chickens have a sense of cause to effect in which the effect would be consuming the bug or other living life form.

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A hiker gets lost on a trail and ends up wondering deep into the woods. He comes upon an amish farm. He knocks on the door and an amish man answers. The hiker explains his predicament, and the amish man says "sure you can stay in barn, but promise me one thing, don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course I won't". He then goes to the barn. Right before the hiker falls asleep. The amish farmer comes in and says "make sure you don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course not". So the next morning the hiker is rested, well fed and is about to leave when the amish man approaches and says, "Thank you being decent and christian like."

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Why did Donald Duck go to college? He didn't, he's a fictional cartoon character.

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he has Parkinson's Disease which causes his hands to shake uncontrollably thus making drawing anything relatively difficult and a perfect circle impossible.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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