Why did Napoleon cross his legs? Because he had to go to the bathroom

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call a school bus full of black people? Not a school bus

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the older man begin to walk faster after a black man started walking towards him? He was late for work.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is a woman

thumb_up thumb_down +1

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the child with no arms and no legs get for Christmas Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did michael J. Fox say when someone asked him to play catch? "sorry, I'm busy".

thumb_up thumb_down -1

how did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to a chicken..

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why arnt black people alowed in bars? Because monkeys don't drink beer! DER DA DER.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

why do anti jokes suck???? Because CC is Jewish and rapes orphan squirrels EJ

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How much does a Mexican Parade cost? A Nickel

thumb_up thumb_down -3

how do you get a blue waffle? paint your vagina blue

thumb_up thumb_down -7

why did the chicken cross the road? because he felt like it.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do a bicycle and a platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A duck walks into a 7-11 and says "Give me some chapstick, put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because as all people know, Ducks cannot speak, however, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need chapstick anyway, since he has no lips.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Yo momma is so dumb she... oh god, i'm so sorry, she was driving and she just looked down at her cellphone and there was a red light and all the cars were coming she didn't even stop oh god i'm so sorry.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you not want to get when playing scrabble? Diarrhea

thumb_up thumb_down -11

In soviet Russia... there is a distinct probability that you will get mugged due to the high crime rate and gang ruled streets.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call a black man who gets in the car with a drunk woman? An unsafe, yet easily avoidable situation.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

There was a priest, a rabbi, and a shaman. All three of three of them walked into a bar. They began a heated debate over the benefits of their healthcare plan, payed the tab on their drink, then proceeded to drive home in their Toyota Prius.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why couldn't dracula's wife get to sleep? She had insomnia.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What do you think about whats happening in the middle east right now? You're an idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Meanwhile, at La'kaneisha's family reunion, they had a great time eating caviar, steamed lobster, and rare bull testicals.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops