What's big and messy? A big mess

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A horse walks into a bar. He called him Arthur. Those are two sentences.

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It's likely that very few people will read this.

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why are some people black? Because god decided there needs to be different people in the world therefore none are congruent

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What did the little boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? Cancer..... Just Kidding! He got a bike!

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How do you get an elephant into a freezer? You stuff him in there!!

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What is the oppisite of water? Dry!

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A man walked up to a fork in the road. He bent down, picked it up, and continued on his journey.

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Doctor I have a headace! The doctor was dead.

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Roses are red My balls are blue Get off Unless You want too

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If you just read this, You're dead.

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Knock knock Who's there? Me Me who? Me me Oh

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Why did the black man cross the road? he just wanted to cross the road, racist. ... after he had robbed a bank

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A fake pizza delivery guy goes to a party and tries to deliver DiGornios pizza in another companys pizza box. The party host calls the police and the guy gets charged for stealing another companys uniform and impersonating a pizza palace worker. He had to return the uniform.

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Do you like fishsticks? Ya, me too.

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What's green, has 4 legs and can kill you if lands on your head? a pool table.

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What is the difference between 1 and 2? 2 is a higher number than 1.

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Two fuses wearing bombs for hats were sitting on a bench with their frayed feet dangling on the ground. A match was walking along and tripped, hitting it's head on the ground and bursting into flame. Luckily the fuses had finished lunch by that time and gone back to work. Unluckily for the match it died from burns to 80 percent of it's body.

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How did the Holocaust start? Hitler threw a penny into the oven

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What's white and horny? A unicorn

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so a man walks into a bar...... He has a couple laughs over some drinks then went home.

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Fill in the blank: A ______ is a man's best friend. Jake: Is it dog? Host: YES! Now for the 1 million dollars! Finish the sentence: I just saved a lot of money by Jake: Switching to Geico? Host: Sorry, that's incorrect. The correct answer is "I just saved a lot of money by not spending it on useless junk and by budgeting my account towards investing in the future." Oh well, nice try.

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You know what rhymes with sloth? Rape.

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Where would canada be without nature? still here

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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