Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: A kid fell in the mud.

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Cat ate a battery, did volts.

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what happened when u got some swag? i don't know u still don't have any

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Do you know why, when geese fly south for the winter, one side of the V is always longer than the other? Because there are more birds on that side.

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Why did the stop sign run a red light? Because it couldn't see its face...

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Why was the little girl crying in the woods at night? There was psychotic killer chasing her with a chainsaw.

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A woman walked out of the kitchen.

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Take part of what?

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there once was a little boy who lived in a little house with his little parents who ate little food. one day the boy went on a website called antijokes and he started to read a joke, by the time he had gotten to the end of the joke he realized that there was no punchline but it was very lenghty and quite pointless.

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a brunet,a redhead,and a blone were stranded on an island 4 miles away from land. the brunet swam 1 mile and drowned. the redhead swam 2 and drowned. the blond swam 3 miles and decided to swim 3 miles back to the island

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why was the mother sad? her sons school was bombed by terrorists. there we no survivors

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what did the apple say to the orange? -- NOTHING! APPLES DO NOT TALK!

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Why did David Hasselhoff talk to his car? Because it was KIT from knight Rider and had voice recognition software and so could understand him

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? -Because he didn't have any arms!

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There's a 4 door kayak going down the street and it loses a wing. How many doughnuts fit in a dog house? And remember its not yellow, because snakes don't have armpits.

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Everything makes me look good, Rape doesn't look good on anyone, and it hurts everyone involved

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My grandfather slipped on a banana peel. I helped him up.

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EVERYONE TEXT 513-550-3742 AND ASK HIM WHY HE HAS GOOP IN HIS PANTS. his names eric

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What's worse than dieing? Not much.

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Three men walk into a bar, one ducks and two fall down. What happened? They walked into a metal bar, like a sideways flagpole!

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What was the only reason a ginger ever won in a fight? It was against a Dementor.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His whole family killed themselves.

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knock knock whos there I AM YOUR MOTHER!!!!

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did you hear about the mexican that went to college? yes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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