Repeat after me: Silk, Silk, Silk, What's the square root of 465?

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What did the Firefighter say to his crew when they put out the fire.... - Let's go home.

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Scenario: Two guys are out hunting. Two guys are walking and a one falls down. The other calls 911 and the guy still standing asks what to do. The person at the hospital told him to make sure his friend was dead, then heard a gunshot. The guy who called said "Now what do I do?"

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A horse walks into a bar. He politely holds the door for a young woman.

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Q: How many lightbulbs does it take to screw in a dog house, if your parents are a washing machine and a dryer? A: Trick Question, dog houses can't fly!

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One day, I was talking to a lamp on the phone, when I realized I had called the wrong lamp.

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Q: What is the first thing you do if you wake up and meet the entire justice league(!!!) Which tells you that you are the "chosen one" and that only you can save the world once your true powers awaken? A: Increase your schizo medication.

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

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What do you call a black person that plays golf? Jack, his name is Jack.

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Gustavo Andrade

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My closet is like the wardrobe to Narnia, accept my closet isnt a portal into a magical world.

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A man tells a blonde "you are what you eat" and she replies "well, i don't think I've eaten any sexy beasts today.'

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Do you know what a zombie smells like? Death

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Q:What do you call a mexican witha clean record? A: Impossible

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How did the the the police know Princess Diana had dandruff? They found her head & shoulders in the glove compartment.

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the person who wrote 1 under me is gay

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Why did the black man cross the road? He was chasing the chicken

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So a crippled guy rolls into a bar..

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What does it take to make the best anti-joke ever? not this

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Why was the wife laying on the ground crying? Because she wasn't in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband

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If the goverment wants us to be eco friendly then why are the eco friendly cars so expensive?

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What did the man say to the tree? Nothing, he was a mime.

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A mexican fast food worker accidentally drops a cheeseburger on the ground. Realizing the floor is most likely unsanitary, he throws it out and gets the customer a new one.

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Why did the man eat his own shoe? Because it was a tissue box.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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