Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he lost his grip on the branch and was unable to reach another before reaching the ground.

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How do you stop someone from dying of cancer? Shoot them in the head.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot turned into a loaf of bread.

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Wanna hear a joke!? Miley Cyrus.

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No.

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Lockerbie bombing

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A man was driving to work when he realized he hadn't told his wife happy anniversary. He turned the car around to head back home only to remember that their anniversary was on Friday, not Thursday. The man shared some nervous laughter with himself as the radio played in the background. He continued on toward work and had a run of the mill day meeting with potential clients.

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What did I say when I fell of THEEeEeeeeeeee...

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Penis

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A chicken walks into a bar and the bartender asks "What'll it be?" His friends are very concerned about his sanity.

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What's bigger than a whale and has no water? Africa.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 is a serial rapist with a violent temper.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Somebody pushed it

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Steering Wheel Face.

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Why did the chicken cross the park? To get to the other slide.

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Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

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What's worse than losing your job? Getting brutally sodimized and murdered by a serial rapist.

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This is not Will Smith.

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What's worse than getting raped? Getting raped twice.

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What did the boy say after he hit his head? I just hit my head.

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Did you hear about the woman you got hit by a car? The Driver was intoxicated and had no control over his faculties which cause him to careen off of the road and hit this poor soul as she patiently waited at a crosswalk.

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Matt swam through watter. Gaby drowned on dry land.

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Q: How many dead people does it take to change a light bulb? A: Trick question...i have sex with them in the dark

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What was the woman doing in the kitchen? Investigating a murder..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops