What did the bullied schoolboy do when he got home from school? He cried himself to sleep.

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What did one rock say to the other rock? Nothing, rocks are inanimate objects, therefore rendering them unable to participate in the activity of speech.

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You know what happens when you assume. You jump to a conclusion that could conceivably have severe consequences.

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A rat scurries into a bar. Six days later, all of the people in that bar die of bubonic plague.

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-Why did Sara fall off the swing? -I don't know, why? -She had no arms, knock knock -Who's there? -Not Sara.

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What do gay horses eat?........ Cheese

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Why is one side of a geese formation heading south always longer than the other? It has more geese

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Why doesn't Rick Moranis come out with anymore movies? He left the film industry in 1997, six years after the 1991 loss of his wife, Anne, to liver cancer.

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im jewish

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What does the time bomb say to the idiot? Nothing, time bombs are inanimate objects and therefore can't speak.

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nathan palmer has a big head !

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knock, knock, TRICK OR TREAT

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Want to hear a joke? Jerry Sandusky's innocence

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if life gives u lemons....chuck them back and say u wanted muffins instead!!!!!!!!!!!

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Q; What's something that's long and girls like to suck? A: A popsicle

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how did the dinosaurs die? they got old

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josh simpson has cancer

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What do you get when you put a dead baby and some nails in a blender? A dead baby and some nails

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Jim and Larry work together. Jim works hard, and Larry is a bit of a prankster. One day, Jim is having a rather rough day, and Larry looks to cheer him up with a good-natured joke. Knowing that Jim's wife prepares dinner for him every night of the week, he calls her and tells her that their boss has decided to pay for a dinner out, that she should take the day off and just get ready for Jim to come home and pick her up. Larry will later follow up by calling a pizza delivery place and having them send a special no hard feeling message with two large delicious pizzas. He forgets to call the pizza delivery man until later that night, after which it's too late and he thinks "I'll just explain the joke to Jim tomorrow." And goes peacefully to sleep. Arriving home and finding that dinner is not prepared, Jim savagely beats his wife.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? The Police, your family just died in a car accident/

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Yo' momma's so fat that when she steps on the scales the number seen to appear is proportionately larger than that seen to appear when the average human steps on them.

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what's funnier than the holocaust? 2 holocausts and 9/11

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There once was a genie With a sevenfoot weenie And he went to the lady next door She thought it was a snake So she hit it with a rake And then he murdered the shit out of her.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he lost his grip on the branch and was unable to reach another before reaching the ground.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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