How do you knock up a Catholic girl? Put your penis into her vagina without wearing a condom.

how many dicks can you fit into mia khalifa's ass

why Is the teen's sock crusty? he stepped in the glue that his little sister was using for her art project.

Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes home from camp.

What do you call the man with no arms or legs, swimming in the bay? Bob.

Q: Knock - Knock A: NO SOLICITORS!

I had a chocolate chip cookie today, thats it, just a chocolate chip cookie.

here is a good joke... your moms a bitch END OF STORY!

Why did billy have a frog stapled to his face? Because he was having a bad day.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle!

So I said to the man "That's no banana, thats my wife!"

Whats worse than getting hit in the face with an axe? Getting hit in the face with two axes.

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Knock knock *I need to either stop masturbating or answer the door* He's probably masturbating. *Who's there?* The other guy left. The end.

There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It is not a sentient animal and is unaware of the dangers it will face.

Když si to Nikolas ,dejme tomu že Bihary, you know nuseng.. hahahahaha

what do yo call two dog? dogs.

Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

What did the Firefighter say to his crew when they put out the fire.... - Let's go home.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "why the long face?" The horse replies "my whole family was killed in 911... And I used the money I got from life insurance to get plastic surgery to always have a smile on my face. My doctor botched the surgery, so now my face is elongated. Even for a horse, of course."

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

Why did the little boy fall over. Because someone shot him in the face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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