A kid comes across an injured duck near a lake. Nevermind he doesn't see it he's really high.

A blonde walks into a bar. She enjoys a refreshing, cold beverage with friends before returning home to sleep ahead of another day of hard work as a scientist.

If god gives you lemons keep the lemon go to the store and buy oranges to make orange juice.

Why do so many black athletes drive black cadillac escalades? Because it's roomy and they deserve to reward themselves after they put in so much hard work trying to be the best player they can be.

A man with a barbie doll walks into a bar. He goes up to the bartender and says "I bet you $100 that I can turn this barbie doll into a beautiful lady". The bartender laughs and says "Okay." The man takes out a brush and begins brushing the doll's hair. Seconds later the man has a seizure and falls to floor a dies. It turns out he was a drug addict and had a fatal over dose. The bartender never got his $100.

A man and a woman have drunk, unprotected sex, and 9 months later, they have a beautiful baby girl. What did they call her? An accident.

What happened to the baby bird? It fell out the nest

NEVER

A: If a quiz is quizzical, what is a test? B: A test can be many things: 1. A procedure for critical evaluation; a means of determining the presence, quality, or truth of something; a trial: a test of one's eyesight; subjecting a hypothesis to a test; a test of an athlete's endurance. 2. A series of questions, problems, or physical responses designed to determine knowledge, intelligence, or ability. 3. A basis for evaluation or judgment: "A test of democratic government is how Congress and the president work together" (Haynes Johnson). 4. Chemistry a. A physical or chemical change by which a substance may be detected or its properties ascertained. b. A reagent used to cause or promote such a change. c. A positive result obtained. 5. A cupel. A: Oh.

Q: Whats different about pizza and jewish people? A: Pizzas don't scream in the oven.

Why did helen keller's dog run away? He lost track of his destination and got lost.

Why did the chicken cross the mobius strip? to ge to the same side

The verification for this post was debatable: "Which of these does not belong?" George Bush Barack Obama Bill Clinton Ronald Reagan Head of Cabbage Answers on a postcard please... [L]

Why did Poppy lose at sports day? Because she had a heart attack and died.

A thief walks into a bank. He has an account there and withdraws 200 bucks.

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a pile of dead babies in my garage.

What's the relationship between a frog and a building? They have nothing to do with each other so stop trying to figure out this query.

What did the Albino say to the other albino? Due to heredity and our inheritance of Chromosomes causing albinism, We could be displaced in society but luckily, we have eachother. They went home and lived happily. But not ever after. That craps or normal people. (freaking albinos...)

I hear eating an apple a day keeps the other apples in check.

How do you get rid of black people in your back yard? Politely ask them to leave.

What did the disrespectful cow say to his parents? Mooo. I hate you both

What did Sammy get for Christmas? Raped.

Why did the boy fall of the swing He had no arms

What is black and white and red all over? Interracial sex partners with smallpox.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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