Why are there so many smiths in the phonebook? Because they all have phones.

What's 13 inches long and 3 inches wide and drives women crazy? My diick

Why did the man hit the little boy? His brakes failed.

Why did the boy die while brushing his teeth? The toothbrush wasn't water-proof.

There's a black and a mexican guy in a car. Who's driving? The chauffeur.

Camon is to Jerry Sandusky as Cole Ryder is to Will Higgins!

Old Mother Hubbard Went to the cupboard, To give the poor dog a bone: When she came there, The cupboard was bare, And so the poor dog had none. So Old Mother Hubbard was reported for animal cruelty

What happened when the president cut the hedge That is a highly improbable solution because he would probably have a body guard do it.

What did the driver have when he got hit by another car? An accident.

Mother Mary held her daughter 20 minutes under water. Not to save her from her troubles, just to see the funny bubbles

What would Marylin Monroe be doing right now if she was alive? Clawing her way out of her coffin.

"What's black when clean, but white when dirty?" "A blackboard."

Who lived in a pineapple under the sea?

what the difference between a dog and a blue whale? im going to burn your house down

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? Almost everything.

A detective? I think more about that chip and dale thing, that was not funny, the classics are okay I suppose, but that newer thing detective-ish maybe. Uh... Do I get a clue? I have not like watched all of them.

I am strangling you. Do you see my arms? I AM FREAKEN STRANGLING YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

You are right, the past still has its claws deep within me thank you friend.

womens rights

What did the little boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer What did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that far

Why can't Scrillex fish? Because He is too busy to practice fishing.

Why did the clown's ballon animal pop? He was a victim in a drive by shooting.

what did one gay guy say to the other gay guy? want to suck dicks? (cause that's what gays do)

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was Tuesday!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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