The other day I went into the bathroom to take a poo, It was Glorious I flushed the toilet and everything.

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A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

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What has a skinny head and specky? Josh Moran.

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A man walks into a bar. He goes up to the Bar Tender and says, "Hit me with all you got!" The bar tender then ducks down under the bar out of sight. He comes back up with a sledge hammer and viciously murders the man. Blood spews everywhere and many others are brutally murdered shortly afterwards. :)

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Why did the man fail to enter the CAPTCHA phrase correctly? Because he was actually a bot, and bots are typically prohibited from accessing information on most public web sites.

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Why can't monkeys and kuala bears get along? Because they are two entirely different species that cannot communicate with each other...

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One day Rebecca Black was driving down the street in a brand new convertible Luckily a policeman pulled her over after observing that she was far too young to be driving a car. Underage driving is a serious offense and should not be endorsed in music videos.

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Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

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What is the best part about being a rapist? The orgasms.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad with colours Nice T!ts

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Q:How many cavemans does it take to screw in a lightbulb A: None there was no electricity back then

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Shelly tells Rob to go home... Thats what she said

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What does a dog in a microwave look like? You tell me, I normally close my eyes when I masturbate ?_?

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Why did the chicken attempt to cross the road? To see if it could.

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So you keep your knowledge sharp do you? When it comes to hypnosis and such?

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Did you hear about the guy who fed his dog his baby? No Oh

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Hey dude when is 4th of July? I don't know.

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why was the little boy sad? because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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What did the cancer patient say before they died? I am in so much pain. I love you all

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why did the guy cross the road? Because he felt like it

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A bunch of teens were egging the house of their science teacher for giving them homework over break. They got caught by their teacher's ex-husband and he told them, "She broke up with me for telling her she was being too hard on her students. So, my friends, egg on!!!!!"

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I'm hungry.

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Why was the little girl sad? She had a grown man sexually assault her.

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What did Batman say to Robin to get in the car? Get in the car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops