How do you acquire a bomb? Go to the bomb store.

Why was the penguin popular? He cuts himself.

A man felt a pain in his stomach. He went to the doctor.

Why are rich guys gay? Because they hang around other rich guys

knock knock. Who is there? You have. You have who? Your entire family in my basement.

A little boy walks into a bar its fine, he's over 21, he just looks younger.

How did the mom quiet her screaming baby? She threw it out the window.

Is it not a antijoke? When your granpa uncle or whatever used to pull out basically worthless coins out of your ears? And each time you wanted for him to drag out so many you can actually buy some bubblegum or something, the "stash" you where saving diminishes the moment you receive a new coin? Moral: Dont believe in yourself! Believe in me! Because I believe in you!

Why didn't the magician pull a rabbit from a hat? Despite his choice of occupation, magic tricks are rarely appropriate in hostage situations.

Knock Knock. Who's There? I don't know. I'm paralyzed.

Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

What did the little boy say to his cat? Masturbate on my moms corpse.

You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, when the bass droped, my balls did too.

Why did a girl get an STD? She had sex.

What do you get when you cross an elephant with a giraffe? A really f*cked up hybrid.

I cried because I had no shoes until I met a man with no feet... ...then I made fun of him and laughed.

q.how do u kill a jew? a.you glue a penny to the bottom of a pool

whats the stage after cancer? you die

knock knock who's there? the paperboy the paperboy who? i lied, i'm a serial rapist, you should have looked through the peephole

Did You Hear About That Mexican Who Went To College? no. Well plenty of them go to college every day. thats good to know.

How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

What about the cool kids down the block. Their friend just died with a serious health condition.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to commit suicide through vehicular manslaughter and knew that the average human being would not be able to stop before it was too late.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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