The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

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Why was the little boy sad? Both of his parents died in a tragic car accident.

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What's long and hard on a black man? Second Grade

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Why do they call Jean a redneck? Because her neck was red from being in the sun for so long.

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Whats black and white and red all over? My wife, i constantly beat her and I should probably be arrested for it if she didnt love me so much

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whats the same between a mouse and an elephant? They are both small except for the elephant

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Why was Tommy late for school? He got raped by spiderman.

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What do Alzheimer patients think of the internet. Happy pi day.

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A man in a state penitentiary drops his soap. He then picks it up and continues his shower.

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MR MCANN WHAT COLOUR IS YOUR PUBES ?

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Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because it got hit by a bus

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If life hands you lemons your probably hallucinating.

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today in aa we were telling stories one of them was: that a girl put a wet cat (to dry it) in the oven

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Two men fought over a bag of peanuts. The peanuts won.

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Okay.. So a dyslectic man walks into a bra...

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What's the best part about having sex with twenty eight year olds? They've reached sexual peak but aren't yet past it. Plus, they still aren't in their 30's.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he died.

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A horse walks into a bar. A chicken crosses the road. Humanity is no more. Nature reclaims the Earth.

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Your mum is such a slut, I'd reccomend she seeks psychiatric help, as her deviant promiscuity is clearly a phsical manifestation of some deep rooted psychological disfunction. We all wish her well.

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Why did the guy go to the store? He really doesn't want you to know every detail of his life.

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An English couple walk int a Portuguese bar. They never see their daughter again.

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why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

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Q: What did the police officer tell the man without a shirt on? A: Put a shirt on.

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A plane crashes on the border of canada and america, where do you bury the survivors? I lied there are no survivors and the bodies were incinerated by burning jet fuel so theres nothing to bury.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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