Q: A man walked into a bar and said, "Ouch!" Why? A: The man walked into a METAL bar.

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A dad says to his son "you better stop masturbating or youll go blind'. And the son says "dad im over here".

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in·fun·dib·u·lum? 1. a funnel-shaped organ or part. 2. a funnel-shaped extension of the hypothalamus connecting the pituitary gland to the base of the brain. 3. a space in the right ventricle at the base of the pulmonary artery.

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Q: What present did the Taliban's wife get on the islamic holiday A: a beating

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Son come here OK daddy Daddy what are you doing DADDY NO! DADDY NO!

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga in the morning You poke her face

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Sooo, when exactly did you become a man? Is this subject boring you?

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whats the diferrence between a bush and an old lady? it be wierd if a bush had an old lady.

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there's a new drink out called the Bin Laden... it consists of two shots and a splash of water

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When life gives you lemons, chuck them at someone's face!

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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What do you call a black man on the moon An astronaut

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OMG, I have a really funny alzheimer's joke. Your'e gonna love it! Uhh, I umm kinda forgot what it was now.

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What do you say if you wake up and see your television floating around at night? Say,"I should probably get to sleep. This is probably an effect of sleep deprivation."

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Woah, I mean if I was not like super high right now, I would totally hate you for that, you are what we call a charming asshole Nero, you can do that kinda stuff and completely get away with it, I feel like I should be really ashamed... So like does it work on everybody reading this? That would be wack, so much fun to do that.

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Roses are red My balls are blue Get off Unless You want too

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why was the boy crying? cause an elephant tusked him up the ass

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KNOCK KNOCK. WHO'S THERE? BOO. OH, HEY. COME IN. ....

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the awkward moment when you kill everyone in school and blame it on the fat kid

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What's green, has 4 legs and can kill you if lands on your head? a pool table.

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Two fuses wearing bombs for hats were sitting on a bench with their frayed feet dangling on the ground. A match was walking along and tripped, hitting it's head on the ground and bursting into flame. Luckily the fuses had finished lunch by that time and gone back to work. Unluckily for the match it died from burns to 80 percent of it's body.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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A woman stopped making sandwiches.

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Why was the girl-scout crying? I hit her in the knee with a baseball bat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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