Why did the boy throw his alarm clock out of the window? Because he was angry at the alarm going off

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Why couldn't the little boy open his bedroom door? He was dead.

What do you call a zebra eating Cheerios? A zebra eating Cheerios.

Blonde: what does IDK stand for? Brunett: i don't know Blonde: NOBODY KNOWS!!!

What did hitler say to the jews? Die.

A man dressed as a woman gets hit in the nuts they fall to the ground in pain

What colour is an orange? Orange. What did you expect?

So three Irish guys walk out of a bar

What do call a fly with no legs? Dead

why did the jockey lose the horse race? he mistook his horse for Sara Jessica Parker

A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

why cant the blind man read brail? he has no fingers

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Two guys walk into a bar the third guy ducks

Michael walked into a bar, The rest of the bar initially erupted with laughter until the his carer made everybody aware that Michael suffered from brittle bones and that he had actually fractured his hip after colliding with the bar. People then understood the gravity situation as the bartender immediately dialled the emergency services. Michael managed to recover physically from the accident but to this day he is still scarred from the laughter aimed at him the night of his accident and is too afraid to return to the bar again in fear of being mocked despite the misunderstanding of the situation.

hi im tom. whats your name? joe. hi im tom. whats your name? joe... tom has short term memory loss.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? It's hard to say, as this number depends on a large number of factors including the average area covered by one lick, the pH of saliva, the solubility of Tootsie Pops, the temperature of both the saliva and the Tootsie Pop, and the amount of saliva deposited on the Tootsie Pop after each lick. This is not to mention all the manufacturing irregularities that may occur during production, and varying tongue shapes and solvency properties of saliva.

A man said to another man," you are so stupid you climbed a glass wall to see what was on the other side." The second man said," well you were on this side of the wall and I'm going to kick your ass." The second man had been drinking that night.

Why did Michael Vick run? Because he was being chased by defenders.

When A White Man Sees A Magic Trick - He Claps When A Black Man Sees A Magic Trick - He Does Handstands, Celebrations, And Shouts

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the mountains? A: Bear food.

One time at band camp, We practice playing our instruments and had fun.

So a Jew is walking on the street and he sees a penny, and he decides to pick it up because ever since the fire that killed his family and burned his house down he has been living on the street and he needs all the help he can get.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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