What do you call a popular rap and hip-hop artist? Tunde

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A man came home from work and said to his wife im going to kill u

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Hellen Keller went to town a ridin on a pony, stuck a feather in her hat and called it.. ashhlerthurbujahustar.

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a canoe at him.

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Why doesn't Billy like his new step-dad? He's secretly a murderer and only Billy knows, he wants to tell the police but hes afraid to.

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Two muffins are sitting on a counter. One muffin says to the other "hello." The other muffin says "Oh my god a talking muffin!"

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What's brown and smells like shit? Brown colour. I'm synesthetic.

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Q:Why didn't the Mexican get out of the box? A:Because he liked it in the box.

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What's green and looks like a forest? A forest.

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why did the chicken cross the road it didn't it got hit y a car

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was Tuesday!

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Ask me about my wiener. How's your wiener? I don't have a wiener, I'm a woman.

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the only thing i learned in geometry is when you push two circles together it makes a titty venn diagram

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why couldnt the little boy watch two and a half men? because charlie sheen left and the other guy had surgeery and now has 2 penises

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What did the platypus do whenever he walked into the bar? Nothing. It's a platypus, they don't do much.

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Q. What happened to the dog when he was kick in the privates? A. Nothing he was neutered a year ago.

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Three children had stumbled upon a magic slide. There was a sign on the slide stating that what ever they shouted, they would land in a pool of it at the bottom of the slide. So the first child began sliding and shouted out "JELLY" and sure enough he landed in a large pool of jelly when he reached the bottom of the slide. The next child, so excited to go down the slide began sliding down. She shouted out "LOLLIES" and sure enough she landed in a large pool of sweets and chocolates at the bottom of the slide. Finally, the youngest girl in the group mounted the slide. As she was going down she was enjoying the slide so much that she shouted "POOS POOS" forgetting the rule of the magic slide and finally landing in a large pool of excrement.

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Who would win if Chuck Norris and God fought to the death? None they are both fictional.

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Billy Idol walks into a New York City Bar. He snorts lines of coke with his comrades in the bathroom and continues his night by having sex with attractive underage females

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Why did Poppy lose at sports day? Because she had a heart attack and died.

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Roses are red... Violets are blue... I have Alzheimers... CHEESE ON TOAST

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Want to hear what's totally out of this world? Not wasting a whole page of space for something that doesn't even vaguely resemble a joke. [L]

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whats funny about four dead horses in a park ? the horses are dead!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops