Why did the rooster cross the road? To go play with the other roosters.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Roses are red, violets are blue When I cut you, you bleed

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why didn't the boy get a bike for christmas? He broke the bath tub.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

an old lady walked into a bar, used the bathroom and left. THE END

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why is the turkey always full? Because he is stuffed.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

why was the postman sad? because ran over a small child with his truck

thumb_up thumb_down -12

The New York Giants

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. I don't stalk him on normal days because that is both weird and illegal, thus I cannot come to a conclusion to what he does on opposite day. However, since he is lonely, I hypothesize that he must do something social, since the opposite on that is lonely.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the deaf man say to the blind man? Probably "Look out for that car," but since he has been deaf since the age of 7, his verbal skills are tenuous at best.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the referee go to the zoo? He likes animals

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did they bury the fireman at the side of the hill? Because he was dead

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Congratulations, sir. The judge has determined that the charges of traffic violation against you were indeed incorrect, and you will be given a large sum of cash for your wasted time.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What is the difference between a urologist and a can of chili? One is hot and spicy, and the other analyzes urine.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being brutally murdered as you are watching your guts spilling out of your body

thumb_up thumb_down -12

The duck walked up to the lemonade stand and he said to the man who was running the stand, hey I cancer CC

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why couldn't the boy talk? He had his fathers hairy scrote was in his mouth

thumb_up thumb_down -14

dark humor is like food... not everyone gets it

thumb_up thumb_down -14

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychological disorder.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why do all asians all look alike? Because they do.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

yo momma so fat dora couldn't even explore her!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How come the kid couldn't go to college Because he was black and couldn't afford it

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops