What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

Why couldn't the Muslim eat pork? He didn't have a tongue.

What did the mom tell her son who she caught masticating loudly? "Do it with your mouth closed!"

Q: why did the little boy fall off the swing? A: He had no arms Q: Why couldn't he get up? A: He died when he hit the ground

A horse walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer, the bartender quickly takes out a shot gun and shoots the horse because he is secretly dealing horse meat to tescos

Hey man, you the tall one! Yes? Do you understand me? No. But you do overstand me right? Yeah, I overstand most people.

why doesnt john lipka have a job? because the unemployment rate is high these days.

Ask me if i'm a tree. Are you a tree? No. okay? Why did the chicken cross the road? why? because its motor skills allowed it to cross. dude, seriously? What did Jimmy's grandmother get him for Christmas? What?. Nothing she died two years ago. that's horrible. When did she die? On his birthday. Dude, stop! Wait how did she die? Fine, How? She was driving down the road and swerved to miss a chicken. oh. And what did she hit? UGGG What? Thankfully not me. because I wasn't the tree. :0 oooooooooooooh

Q: What is better than Vagina? A: Nothing

Wanna hear a joke? No? Oh

Why did the kid lose his nose? because his brother chopped it off with an axe.

Why did the Pakistani man cry when the Nigerian man was killed in a terrorist attack? They were lovers.

What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

woman's rights

Barack Obama is a good president.

Why didnt the chicken cross the road? He was chicken.

why'd the chicken committed suicide?? to get to the other side

You know its time to leave when she wake's up out of her coma and your balls are on her chin.

What did the black man say when he jumped in the pool? The water's nice, you should join me.

A man in a state penitentiary drops his soap. He then picks it up and continues his shower.

A apple a day keeps gramar away.

why barack obama sad he realized the 4 trillion dollars of debt wasn't going be solved by borrowing more money

Why did the chicken cross the road? It escaped.

Wayne Rooney's face and intelligence.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...