What's a fry cook's favorite day? Saturday. It's his day off.

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why did the girl ask for food? because she was hungry and hadnt eaten in days.

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the bird.

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Bugs dance, so do ants, Oh my glob it’s Adventure Time!

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My grandpa died in the holocaust. How? He had gas.

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"Knock Knock" "Just ring the bloody bell for once!"

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what did the mexican do yesterday? bang your mom

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What did the boy in the striped pajamas get for Christmas? A shower.

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Person 1: want to hear a joke? person 2: yes.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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why were the negros at whitney houstons funeral smiling? because there were free sandwiches!

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What do you call a man with no eyes? A hero for going to war and surviving being tortured by the Vietnamese.

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What's worse than 50 dead babies stapled to trees? 47 dead babies stapled to trees (it's better if it's a nice, round number.)

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How do you catch a green elephant? you paint it red and use a Red Elephant Trap

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Guess who is violent. Osama

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A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

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why do midgets surf in kitchens? because of microwaves.

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his access to goods and services and his future options from birth.

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Jerry Sandusky walks into an Under 21

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Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at Mcdonalds? Because I don't have a job, are you hiring?

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My ex wife looks like a pitbull.

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a charmander decided to take a swim a.w. j.p.

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Chuck Norris gets punched in the face.

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A Mexican guy, a black guy, and an ISIS member walk into a bar. The black and Mexican men, realizing the potential danger in the situation quickly exit the bar and alert the proper authorities. $

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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