A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says "You have to stop masturbating." The man says "What, why?!" The doctor says "So I can examine you."

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What's the best way to get high without doing drugs? Jump.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

what has 2 legs and red all over half a cat.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

when life randomly gives u lemons, u should probably have a stand cuz people are gonna expect u to make lemonade

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you get when you stab a baby? A dead baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Whats the worst thing about dying? Your not alive anymore.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What's worse than a dead baby inside a microwave? A microwave inside a dead baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the boy fall of his bike? He's learning to ride and understandably lost his balance.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Justin Bieber's gay!! My butt is sexier!(;

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What's worse than a rapist? 2 rapists

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q: How many teenagers does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they just sit in the dark and complain about it.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A man walked into a bar. Ouch! He tripped over the little step at the entrance. But don't worry, he's not hurt, it just startled him for a second there. They should put a caution sign out front, somebody might get a serious injury. You can never be too safe, after all.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Has anyone else noticed that the very least popular and the most popular anti-joke on this site are both related to the Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Physics. Why did Tommy fall of his bike? He was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Q:What's colorful and waves like a flag? A: A flag.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A jew walked out of a bar then goes to the other bar across the street then walks out from the back door to go to another bar The Actions of this jew tells us that there are only 3 bars in the zone and one pet shop

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Knock Knock! Who's There? Billy Sup Billy, come on in!

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did Jimmy get for his first bithday A coffin

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's worse than an earthquake? Two earthquakes. What's worse than two earthquakes? Three earthquakes. What's worse than three earthquakes? The world exploding.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did one ginger say to the other? W are both gingers.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did the man say to the ugly woman? Your face makes my penis soft.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

did you know r kelly and jay z had a album together?

thumb_up thumb_down +19

One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. The fight began and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing you say when you don't want to fight anymore and you let the other person win?" The other guy says to the challanger, "I give up?" Then the challenger yells. "I WIN!"

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops