What happened to the man that walked into the bar... He walked into the bar

thumb_up thumb_down +4

i've got a little something for you. in fact it's so small you can't see it. it's called spermatazoa

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How many black people does it take to tar a roof? Just one. Unless he wants to do it in a shorter amount of time and calls a few friends to help him.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

roses are red violets are green id love to flick owen cliffords mams bean

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why do people laugh at anti-jokes? Because of a chemical reaction to a neurological phenomenon that results from the brain's response to external stimuli.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's disabled and red all over. The kid I hit with my car.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call a man sitting at the bar drinking alone? An alcoholic.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette are on a cruise together. A horrifying accident occurs, sinking the boat and killing all of them. Their deaths are mourned by their respective family members.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A horse walks into a bar and the bartendor says "Why the long face?" The horse replies "My wife was just diagnosed with cancer and given only a week to live."

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A cheerio gets a job at McDonalds and after working for a while, he gets employee of the month and goes to the district ball. While there, he meets a female(frosted) cheerio whom he asks out. She refuses because she only dates frosted cheerios. So, the male goes back to work for the next year, and his boss is happy with his work, so he asks him if he would like anything. The cheerio says yes, i want to be frosted. The boss says ok, i'll make you frosted, so now that he's frosted, he goes back to the ball. He asks the same female cheerio out, she says yes this time. He then asks her if she wants something to drink, she says yes. She wants some milk. So the guy stands in line for about 15 minutes, when he gets to the front, there is no more milk left. So he asks her if she would like some tea. she says yes. So he goes and stands in line for another 15 minutes only to find out there is no more tea. So then he asks her if she would like some punch, shesays yes. So after an hour of searching, he finds out there is no punchline......

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Because the tractor hadn't seen the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

roses are red violets are blue im a paki and you are a jew!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the boy jump off a cliff Because he was gay and committed suicide

thumb_up thumb_down +4

"is it just me or is it getting really hot in here?" "the house is on fire and we are locked in"

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Wath black poeple eat for christmas your food.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the farmer say after the chicken started talking? Holy shit a talking chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why didn't the 12-year old boy eat his birthday cake? He has diabetes and would likely die from the increased spike in insulin.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? You aren't married to a girlfriend.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Friends are like trees. They fall when hit multiple times with an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man walks into a butchers and asks for a loaf of bread the butcher replies " no im a butcher" The man says " its ok my bikes outside"

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Father Time and Mother Nature did the nasty, and had a kid called humanity. It had down syndrome. Very sad.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A clown walking down the steet, trips -Ryan Vallee

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Roses are red, Grass is greener, When I think about you, I play with my weiner

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops