MR MCANN WHAT COLOUR IS YOUR PUBES ?

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A plane crashes on the border of canada and america, where do you bury the survivors? I lied there are no survivors and the bodies were incinerated by burning jet fuel so theres nothing to bury.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He flapped his wings, hovered, and the road crossed beneath him.

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When life gives you lemons, go sell them for crack.

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Why didn't the man give a location of the murderer? He was murdered

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whats the difference between 10 Ferrari's and 10 dead babies ? i dont have 10 Ferrari's in my garage

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Okay.. So a dyslectic man walks into a bra...

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(Mortal Kombat Annihilation) Princess Kitana: "Mother, you're alive" Sindel: "Too bad you, will die" (Troll 2) "They're eating her. And then they're gonna me. Oh my gawwwwwwwwd." (The Room) Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshitt! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] Johnny: I did *not*. Oh hi, Mark. Mark: Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?

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How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb Wanna go ride bikes?

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What's another word for Manslaughter? My new Hobby

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Jack and Jill went up the hill. But it was winter and they froze to death

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Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

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What did Bob say at Fred's house? "I know where Fred lives."

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What happened to George's pet rock? It ran away.

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Whats worse than driving a Ford Taurus? Driving two Ford Taurus'

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There's a blind man walking on the south coast of England. He walks off a cliff.

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Why was the mushroom invited to the party? Because the party was a rave and some mushrooms are know to make the consumer of them hallucinate wildly.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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What did the man think as the foul baseball flew rapidly toward his face? Oh man, I thought my tickets were to an NBA game.

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whats worse than getting eaten by a bear a bear getting eaten by a squirrel who ate you too.

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A blond, burnette, and red head walk into a bar. They sit together and enjoy a few drinks while catching up on eachother's lives.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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Your uncle jack just helped you off a horse. Now it's your turn to help your uncle jack off a horse.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? That is none of your concern as it invades his freedom of privacy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops