A black man is driving down the road in a van, and pulls up to a little a girl and says excuse me Miss. The girl replies Ok Ok I will get the car just dont hurt me The black guy says I dont want you to get in my van im taking your mom on a date.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A man walks into a bar. He goes up to the Bar Tender and says, "Hit me with all you got!" The bar tender then ducks down under the bar out of sight. He comes back up with a sledge hammer and viciously murders the man. Blood spews everywhere and many others are brutally murdered shortly afterwards. :)

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Teacher: What is 1+1? Student: 2 Teacher: Next time raise your hand before answering a question.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

How can you outsmart Stephen Hawking? Steal the wheels of his chair and replace them with a dolphin.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What do you call a drummer without a girlfriend? Homeless

thumb_up thumb_down -27

*Dubstep* CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW BWAB BWAB

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A bunch of teens were egging the house of their science teacher for giving them homework over break. They got caught by their teacher's ex-husband and he told them, "She broke up with me for telling her she was being too hard on her students. So, my friends, egg on!!!!!"

thumb_up thumb_down -27

what did the doctor say to another doctor? we are doctors

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What's worse than a kid with a big head? Nothing you just look weird like Austin

thumb_up thumb_down -27

*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and think it's original because I changed one word*

thumb_up thumb_down -27

cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Y didnt the grandma go to christmas? She died on thanksgiving

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Q. Why did Sarah fall off of the swing? A. She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sarah!

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Nathaniel Nugnes walks into a bra

thumb_up thumb_down -27

How do you make a kids parents mad? Fly an SR71-BLACKBIRD into him.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did the boy not get picked up from soccer? His mom was in a fatal car accident. His dad simply forgot.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What do you call a chicken with no head? A chicken with no head.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What do you call a gay dinosaur? Megasoreass What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? Lickalottapuss What dou you call a gay dinosaurs dog? Megasoreass Rex

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What did the dead woman say to the murderer nothing dead people cant talk

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Roses are black. Violets black. Guns are black. My van is black.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why can't Helen Keller drive a train? Because she's blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

How many apples does it take to keep the doctor away? 1 if you throw it hard enough! haha

thumb_up thumb_down -29

How do you scare a little boy? You tell him everyone he loves was shot to death by you and then kick his guardian .

thumb_up thumb_down -29

A man walked into a bar.He woke up hours later and went home. By TheRealPaddock

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops