Roses are red, Violets are violet, hence the name Violets.

Because the tractor hadn't seen the chicken.

What's brown and sticky? "A stick?" No, poo.

Mary had a little lamb, The nurse and midwife fainted. Because last year she met a ram, And they got too acquainted.

what do you call a masculine female? a post op transexual

whats the best anti joke ever? mine you dipshit

Whats scary about the asian man driving a car? He was blind

Yo mama so fat, her Patronus is a cake.

How many dead rats can you put in your ex-girlfriend's bed? 437.

A Haiku It Is This One Is Kind Of Boring Now It's Time For Bed

When life gives you lemons, you probably just found lemons.

What do the Irish do on their birthdays? Eat birthday cake and sing happy birthday

When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

How did a monkey fall out of a tree? He slipped on a banana.

What is black and white and red all over? Zebra domestic violence isn't funny.

Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

what do you call a blonde who can't drive? a poor driver

Why did the chick cross the road? To get to the brothel for hot lesbian love.

Ask me if I am a Truck Are You a Truck No

What did the doctor say to the minority, parapalegic after he barely escaped a fire alive? You just got burned!!

What do you call a middle-eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

Schizophrenia will affect over 1.5 million people this year. At least, thats what my flying, albino pet rhinoceros told me.

What did Jamaal say when he was in Walmart? I'm Jamaal and I'm in Walmart.

I went to the opticians to get my eyes checked. The optician said "you need glasses".

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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