How do you make a bird drop a worm? Wring it's neck. P.S: If that anti-joke didn't persuade you to vote thumbs up for this post, then perhaps these delightful lyrics will convince you otherwise. I see them staring back at me They know my name The faces in the sky are looking for something more My friends have paper smiles and laugh at me in all my trials Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia My friends have hollow eyes They're made of shapes and curvy lines Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow [. From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/e/elena-siegman-lyrics/pareidolia-lyrics.html .] My pareidolia The loneliness is only missed when I am alone O yeah I might try to find my light tonight Hide my sight from eyes I try to fight My nine eyes of light die by the blight Ride white knight unite my plight tonight They're inside me They're inside me I'm inside out I'm inside out They're all around Within without Within without They're inside I'm outisde They're all around They're all around They're inside me I'm inside out They're all around Within without It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia la lalala lalala lalala lala

wat does say to another bird....... chirp chirp

Women's rights

Why is little Susie crying? Her entire family is dead.

Making jokes about 9/11 is just plane wrong.

you are so ugly you continuously get made fun of for it everyday and already have a savings account for plastic surgery in the near future.

The President, a terrorist, a student, and a genius were on a crashing plane. They all died.

Why did the woman die Because she was old

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is a woman

The Aristocrats

Q: what do you call a guy with a stolen cat in his pocket A: The police because stealing animals is illegal

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A bike.

A black guy, mexican, and asian walk into a bar. They leave soon after because they heard the "one about them"

Knock. Knock. No one is home. Okay.

whats the diffference between pizza and a jew? burning a pizza makes me sad, burning a jew is worthy of a party!

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

dildo

what do you call a muslim flying a plane 911

What did the baby get for his 1st birthday? Nothing, he was a Harlequin baby, therefore dying during the last stages of pregnancy.

i saw a garbage truck it had garbage in it

That's unfortunate.

Why can't bob fix it? I through a frige at him.he died.

Yo' mama so retarded shes retarted!

In Soviet Russia you drive car, because a car driving you would be screwed up.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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